Funny Sex Toy Reviews #39

Jack Rabbit Signature Thrusting Rabbit
I feel like if my vagina could say, “Thank you” it totally would. It wouldn’t sound very pretty, but you don’t have to be audibly pleasing to be grateful. I genuinely feel the need to take off work for a few days to really give this the time it deserves.

Pure Enrichment Peak Wand Massager
Got this to ‘spice it up’. Gave it to my girl, her eyes lit up. She went home. I haven’t seen her in 2 weeks. I probably should have thought this through better.

Realistic 9 Inch Big Boy with Balls
It took some effort on both our parts but after a few short moments, the mighty schlong was hitting parts of her vagina that she wasn't even aware existed. At one point, I'm pretty sure she started speaking in tongues and I distinctly remember wondering if one could find an Exorcist on Google at short notice. Needless to say, she took it like a champ and came harder than ever before.

Thigh-High Fishnets
they must be cool, because they keep getting stolen from me

Icicles No. 47 Glass Butt Plug
My girl is in love with it more than me now. She’s taking it to A Drake concert and leaving me at home. It’s ok though.

Mega 2-Inch Extension
She loves it so much she named me mr thunderman when we use it. Lots of noise and wetness.

Petal Pusher Labia Spreader
My husband thought an alien had evaded me, but WOW it was a fantastic trip with him.

A&E Silicone G-Gasm Rabbit
The product and my wife came as advertised.

AA Batteries
They power my climax. Give it up for batteries! Without them, my hands would be tired!

Lucid Dream #14 G-Spot Vibe
Great vibrations from top to bottom. The wife really enjoyed it, the screams from her O got the neighbors dogs to barking. It was that powerful!