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After putting together a list of MILFs for Mother’s Day, your friends at Adam and Eve decided it wouldn’t be fair to leave the guys out of the process. So, we started talking about our favorite older male stars and started imagining what it would be like to have them as a dad – and we’re not talking about just gaining an extra 2 or 3 inches below the waist.
1. Evan Stone – Evan’s like the fun-loving dad who can take the most boring thing imaginable (dusting the house, washing the dishes, cutting the grass with a tiny pair of scissors and a ruler) and make it fun. Easily the funniest porn star out there, Evan never fails to deliver the laughs when he’s not burying his skilled tongue in some girl’s wet box. Slated to play Captain Kirk in the new Star Trek Spoof, Evan’s sure to boldly go where no man has gone before while doing babes many men have done before.
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With prime beach weather know upon us, we’ve pieced together a few helpful tips to help you have a hot and sexy time – whether you’re visiting a clothing-optional resort in the Caribbean or just trying to sneak in an afternoon quickie while the kids are at the arcade.
- No matter how careful you are, sand will find its way in a whole bunch of uncomfortable places. If you’re determined to have sex on the beach, play it cool and at least bring a few towels and wash off in the waves afterwards to help cut down on the problem.
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Craigslist Drops Erotic Service Ads |
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Say goodbye to busty blondes looking for a good time and men with “gifted hands” offering full body massages in the comfort of your own home.
Facing mounting public pressure, Craigslist officials have elected to completely remove the popular "Erotic Services" category from their directory. The Erotic Services section was often used to post ads for escort services, massage parlors and other adult services.
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Don’t Miss the F.A.M.E. Awards! |
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It’s not too late to cast your vote in the only adult awards show where fans call the shots!
Just visit http://www.thefameawards.com to check out all the different categories like Favorite Female Star, Favorite Male Star, Favorite Breasts, Hottest Body, Dirtiest Girl in Porn, Most Underrated Star and others.
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Gay Pride Month – 10 Years and Counting |
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First celebrated 10 years ago, Gay Pride Month was originally created by President Bill Clinton in 2000 as a way to recognize the contributions gay, lesbian, bisexuals, and transgender individuals have contributed to their communities and country as well as commemorate the fight for gay rights.
In 1969, New York City police raided a local gay club in the Stonewall Inn in Greenwich Village. The raid touched off a series of protests and riots over the next few weeks as the police attempted to crack down on the LGBT community. In response, community leaders began to take a more active role in organizing protests and campaigns that would turn into the gay rights movement.
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Since we have enjoyed all of your dirty poem submissions that left us laughing, we thought it would also be fun to include some dirty jokes as well! Send us your favorite dirty joke and we may publish it in our upcoming newsletters. Email us at newsletter@adameve.com.
Here is one of our favorites:
What Do I Look Like?
A newlywed couple just moved into their new house. One day the husband comes home from work and his wife says, "Honey, you know, in the upstairs bathroom one of the pipes is leaking, could you fix it?"
The husband just looked at his wife and said, "What do I look like, Mr. Plumber?"
A few days went by, and he comes home from work and again his wife asks for a favor, "Honey, the car won't start, I think that it needs a new battery. Could you change it for me?"
"What do I look like, Mr. Goodwrench?" was his response. Another couple of weeks go by, and it's raining pretty hard. His wife then finds a leak in the roof. She pleads with him as he's walking through the door. "Honey, there's a leak on the roof! Can you please fix it?"
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Ask Laura & Larry |
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Advice Column:Everyone knows that men and women operate on two completely different wavelengths. To help bridge the divide, we've put together a team of sexperts (Laura and Larry) to offer their perspectives and help solve any problem you might have, other than unusual rashes or bumps. Ask Laura and Larry your questions by emailing them at asklaura@adameve.com and check out next month's newsletter to get their answers! |
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Questions of the Month |
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Dear Laura & Larry,
Several news channels, when covering the April 15 tax protests, made references to "teabagging" and its alternate meaning. I gathered that the term has something to do with oral sex, but that's the extent of my information. Can you enlighten me? Thanks! --Interested
Laura’s Response:
Dear Interested,
Teabagging is the practice of sucking on the testicles and scrotum. It got its name because the movement involved sometimes looks like the action of dunking a tea bag in hot water--when the man is dipping his parts into his partner’s mouth. This can be lots of fun during oral sex, especially if there’s some hand action on the penis, too. A tip: Take care of the hair down there--it can get a bit gnarly on the sack (try some Coochy shave cream). Make it all tasty with some flavored goodness, too, like the ID Juicy Lubes. Enjoy!
Larry’s Response:
Dear Interested,
What were the conservative protesters against . . .taxes? Bailouts? Socialism? I never was sure just what they were protesting – but when they chose the theme of the Boston Tea Party and, by extension, teabags, they unknowingly unleashed a firestorm of giggles from sex enthusiasts around the country. “Teabagging” is a slang term for a sexual position, specifically when a male takes position astride a reclining lover’s head and lowers his testicles into his/her mouth. Long a favorite of the gay community, the position allows for unrestricted oral access of the entire ano-genitalia region. The position suggests dominance and kinkiness, and that’s unlikely what the patriotic tax (bailout? Socialism? Whatever?) protesters intended when they picked the term. Of course the liberal side of the media wasted no time in lampooning the term and the movement in an avalanche of late-night monologue jokes and comedy sketches. One would think with all of the clandestine gay sex going on in some corners of the conservative movement, someone would have gotten the memo . . .
Dear Laura and Larry, I'm sure you hear this one all the time, but how do I have an orgasm with my G spot? --G Whiz
Laura’s Response: Dear G Whiz, The G-spot orgasm differs from a purely clitoral orgasm. The main thing to keep in mind: the G-spot is not an internal clitoris! To begin with, you should start with plenty of foreplay and lots of external clitoral stimulation (a great way to start, if you’re by yourself, is to use a Fukuoku). As you get turned on, begin to insert fingers (yours, or your partners), and start to stroke them forward and down. If you are doing yourself, you’ll be trying to touch your belly button from the inside; if your partner is doing it, he will be crooking his fingers as if to say, “come hither.” Stroke forward and then down. The G-spot is not hiding way uparound the cervix--it’s only about an inch and a half inside, and it’s part of the front wall of the vagina. It swells up when you’re turned on, and starts to respond to friction. Some women say that G-spot stimulation feels like they are stroking their clitoris from inside! Now, the clitoris likes indirect touching and teasing and stimulation, whereas the G-spot tends to respond more to steady rubbing pressure.
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DescriptionMore Support, Stronger Erections!
Enhance and support your erection while you stimulate yourself and your partner! Just stretch this amazing cock cage over your penis -- the 3” cage design with added ball strap supports you and adds extra thrills for you both! Super soft and stretchy jelly accommodates any size man.
Brand: Topco
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Tell us what you think of the The Original Venus Butterfly Email us at newsletter@adameve.com
Women – Wear This Vibrator For Hands-Free Orgasms! |
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The One & Only Original Just Got Better! Before there was the rabbit vibrator, there was the Butterfly vibrator...and there's nothing like wearing an Original Venus Butterfly, alone or with a partner! Your clit will flutter and as the Butterfly vibrator nestles and flickers against your mound! Position the powerful egg vibrator encased in soft jelly material for pin-point stimulation! The Butterfly lands perfectly on your erogenous zone thanks to adjustable straps made from soft, durable fabric –– you can even wear it under your clothes! Set the thumbwheel controller with just one hand and get ready to fly with this wild women’s sex toy! For the woman who wants stimulation from a vibrator without having to hold on to it, the hands-free experience of the Original Venus Butterfly vibrator is perfect –– and unique.
Brand: Cal Exotics
Colors: Pink
Function: Remote control, Clitoral stimulator, Adjustable, Multiple Speeds, Single Vibration
Gender: Female
Length: 3.0 inches
Material: Rubber
Width: 3.00 inches
Avg. Rating: | |
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Recycle Your Old Catalogs |
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Did you know that you can recycle the catalogs and letters you receive in the mail?
From our famous mail-order catalog to that IRS audit letter, the majority of mail you receive is 100% recyclable.
Adam & Eve recently started working with the Direct Marketing Association to increase recycling awareness. Just look for the special "Recycle Please" logo on catalogs and other letters you receive in the mail and drop them off at your local recycling center after placing your order.
With your help, we'll significantly increase the recycling rate and help preserve forests and other natural treasures for future generations to enjoy. |
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Help us, Help you! |
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In our quest to be the best newsletter we can be on a low-budget, limited coffee breaks, and staff of typewriting monkeys, we need your help.
If you have any suggestions of things you'd like to see in the future, especially monthly features so we don't have to waste precious brain space trying to come up with semi-original ideas, then please email them to us at newsletter@adameve.com.
We promise to read your ideas carefully and thoroughly before making fun of the lamer ones and claiming the better ones as our own ideas. Seriously though, if you should proposition an idea that we end up using, we'll give you a shout-out plus a free annual subscription to the newsletter.
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