OVER SENSITIVE PENIS A PROBLEM?
You can Ask Dr. Kat by emailing her at ask@drkat.com.

Dear Dr. Kat,

I am a twenty-eight year old single man. I experience extreme sensitivity of the head of my penis when I masturbate. I also get an achy feeling in my left testicle and I've noticed that my ejaculations are not as forceful (it only trickles out now versus shoots like it used to). My erections seem larger than they used to be but it takes for me longer to get erect. I notice congestion (a feeling of pressure) directly above my genital area too. What could be causing this pressure and why is my penis so sensitive? Is this a blood flow problem?

Thanks,
Bobby

Dear Bobby,

There are many potential issues that you are presenting here. Let's see if we can sort it all out. You decline to mention how long you've been experiencing all of these symptoms but I'll have to assume most of them are new to you. Sensitivity at the head of the penis during ejaculation may be normally associated with sexual stimulation. This may depend on the type of stimulation or merely more of a consciousness of sensation. Alone, it is not something I would be concerned about. In regards to the testicular and lower abdominal discomfort I would suggest that you see a urologist to exclude any infections or other medical disorders. It's very difficult to assess a physical concern like this in written form. If you really want to know what's going on medically -- find a good doc.

The force of ejaculate is usually related to the degree of sexual excitement, male hormone levels, and a man's age. This will vary through a lifetime and the fluctuations you are experiencing sound like a normal variance. Decreased size and rigidity of erections may also be a part of a physical variation. However, a multitude of potential social and psychological factors may be coming into play as well. What types of sexual situations are you getting aroused in? Is it with a partner? How do you feel about he/she?

Your erectile problems seem to be mild in nature but need to be evaluated by a physician if you want to completely know for sure. Such problems might be also psychological or physical in nature. Problems with anxiety and performance are common with such complaints as well. It comes down to giving yourself a break. Instead of worrying -- first see a medical doctor to rule out any physical disorders. If you are still experiencing problems then find a good Sexologist or Sex Therapist in your area to address possible psychological issues. If it's been enough of a problem to write in and ask about and you've had the symptoms for more than a couple of months, the peace of mind of getting a physical exam will be well worth it.

Sincerely,
Dr. Kat

Listen to Dr. Kat's FREE iTunes Podcast "SEX CHAT WITH DR. KAT AND HER GAY BOYFRIEND" here: http://www.drkat.com/Listen.html See what all the buzz is about! Sex Chat is TOP 20 of Sexuality podcasts on iTunes! Hi I'm Dr. Kat, Clinical Sexologist and Relationship Therapist. Join my gay "boyfriend", Ross and I on the couch as we dish about celebrity sex and relationships, sex in the news, what sex toys we like, the nitty gritty of our own relationships and all the while answering your questions about sex, dating, marriage, STDs, sex ed, and the trials and tribulations of life and love in general. It's a 2 for 1 as you get your sex questions answered from both of our perspectives and we have a lot of fun while we're at it. Find out more at www.DrKat.com and e-mail us your questions at sexchat@drkat.com or call our 24/7 Listener Line at 213-270-1968

Back to Top

Back to Top

Play Now | Back to Top

Candidly Speaking
by Candida Royalle
© Femme Productions ®

Praise for the Maligned and
Misunderstood Morning Sex
Unless you're residing in one of the warmer states, and even then it's iffy, there are probably still some dreary late-winter days to get through, and what better way to spend one of them by simply not getting up? Maybe you don't feel like bounding out of bed to get a jump on those saved-up chores.

There are so many wonderfully lazy things one could do on a rare sleep-in day: breakfast in bed, start a new book, watch an old movie… For me it's lingering in that half-sleeping, half-waking state and slowly, sensuously caressing my partner awake, or if I'm alone, caressing myself in to a delirious state of arousal.

I never appreciated morning sex until I was blessed with a lover who knew how to put me in the mood. The debate over who likes morning sex more, women or men, rages on. Consensus seems to be, men: yay, women: nay. But I maintain it's because women generally aren't excited by being woken up from a delicious sleep by having her breasts pawed at like one of those rubber hand-exercisers while getting poked in the back with a stiff object. And believe me, I've conducted many informal surveys amongst my girlfriends.

I suppose one could say the same holds true for women wanting to interrupt a rare morning sleep-in. There are plenty of men who prefer a slow hand, so to speak.

I'm forever reminding people to slow down, take your time, savor each and every moment. In the end, so little of our time is spent making love, whether to a serious partner, an unexpected delight, or to our ol' familiar self. Sometimes it occurs to us that it's been quite a while since we indulged in some good sex, some deep, luxurious sex or even a hot spontaneous quickie. Probably even longer since we had morning sex!

So I'm here to declare the virtues of the much maligned and misunderstood morning sex. To point out that our bodies are just waking up and are more sensitive to touch, and that we're infused with fresh energy and vigor. And to urge you, at the first opportunity you have, to plan on lingering in bed on the morning of a non-work day, no matter what it takes. Send the kids off to a sleep over or arrange to have a sitter pick them up and take them out for the day, starting with a pancake breakfast. Shut off the phones and any other means of intrusion in to your plans, and have morning sex, slowly, luxuriously, like there's no tomorrow. (Stop thinking about those pancakes!) And for best results, remember to begin by sensuously caressing your partner in to an ecstatic state of arousal!

Candida Royalle is a former star of the blue movie screen who in 1984 created Femme Productions(R) and pioneered the genre of woman-friendly adult erotica. In 1999, she launched the Euro-designed Natural Contours(R) line of high-style discreet intimate products. She's the author of How to Tell a Naked Man What to Do, (Simon & Schuster) and a sought after lecturer at universities and professional conferences, including the World Congress on Sexology, the American Psychiatric Association and the Smithsonian Institute. Royalle's product lines are available through AdamEve.com. For more information about Candida Royalle, visit www.candidaroyalle.com.

Back to Top

Curing Vibrator Envy

It might come as a surprise, but a shocking number of men are intimidated by vibrators. It seems we get a call or email every day from a husband that's jealous of his wife's new vibrator and afraid that she'll replace him with her new battery-operated buddy. Some guys go as far as hiding away their wife's new vibrator or even sabotaging it.

The first step is convincing him to go vibrator shopping with you. It might help if you offer him a little incentive – maybe an adult movie or that piece of lingerie he's been dying to see you wear. Including him as part of the process will ensure that he's comfortable with the whole idea. It doesn't matter what exactly you get, just make sure you don't buy a vibrator shaped like a penis. A lot of realistic vibrators are large enough to put real men to shame and it will only exacerbate his fears of being replaced.

Once you get the vibrator, the next step is putting your partner in charge of it as a way to spice up foreplay. Make sure he knows how to use the vibrator and then turn him loose to do anything (within reason) he wants. And return the favor by making him feel just as good as he made you. This way, your guy will see the vibrator as a tool to help put you in the mood. He still gets to have fun; the vibrator just helps you keep up with him!

The next day, you might want to ask him to do some “man things” around the house like fixing a squeaky door or opening a tight jar lid. Sure you could do them yourself, but this is all about making your guy feel needed. And it's a lot better than him catching vibrator envy and getting the dog to use your new rabbit vibrator as a chew toy.

Back to Top