Savvy Sex Questions with Dr. Jenni (continued)

Dear Dr Jenni,

My boyfriend really wants to have sex outside -- like in a public park. He says it's always been a fantasy that he's never got to experience. We've been together two years. It's the longest relationship for us both. But I'm so unsure and scared to do this. I also am scared to lose him if I don't. Thoughts?

-- -Scared of outside sex

Dear SOOS,

Thank you for asking this. It's an important question for all of us considering the theme—the elusive boundaries of sex.

It sounds like your boyfriend desires more taboo in his sex life. The taboo is a common erotic theme for so many of us. If we grew up in an environment that was rigid, which could include physical, emotional, and/or sexual rigidity, then the desire for the taboo can be strong. As humans, we want what we can't have. With a little more exploratory conversation, you and he could likely uncover why outside park sex seems so satisfying. I imagine there is an element of arousal knowing he can get caught. But for someone who doesn't have a deep need for taboo, then the anxiety of getting caught far overwhelms the possibility of any arousal. Perhaps you can explore other safer taboo sexual ideas and activities that satisfy his arousal and fantasy, but also maintain your sense of safety.

I also want to emphasize that I hear your fear around saying no to your boyfriend. You fear losing him to someone else who might say yes to outside park sex. But after conversation and exploration, if your answer is ultimately "No" and he doesn't respect that, it's not a boyfriend you likely want to keep for the long run anyway.

Warmly,

-- Dr. Jenni

Jenni Skyler, PhD, LMFT, CST
The Intimacy Institute
Sex and Relationship Therapy
www.TheIntimacyInstitute.org
(720) 331-3354

The Adam & Eve Podcast - Episode 17

Would you believe that many of the advancements we see in technology began as sex toy innovations? It's true. Sex toy development is at the cutting edge and making strides in how to make an object interact with the human body. Neil and Lucas break down the weird sex news of the day including a training seminar for firefighters to learn how to remove objects stuck in rectums. We learn about famous robots members of the team would like to sleep with from Robocop to Wall-E. After they've joked about sleeping with fictional robots, they talk about real sex toys at the forefront of pleasure. A lively discussion of bluetooth and remote control vibrators, love dolls, and more leads to the team talking about their favorite futuristic sex toys. And yes, there's a sex drone.

You can also listen on:

Shear Pleasures (continued)

Sharon's up for something different this month -- a "ménage à trois" that involves pubic grooming and some creative brushwork. We just hope the paint was water-based. Let Sharon share her story with you…just in the nick of time.

-- The Editors

I'm a 29 year-old redhead, a cute ginger with fairly large breasts and deliciously long legs attached to a slender 5'9" frame. I also have a bare muff underneath my clothes. I've been grooming my puss for about 2 years now. I love it.

The first experience was a whim. My lover at the time, Paul, and I were watching an adult film in which a girl got shaved. Paul was really turned on by the sight of her bare mound and laughingly, I agreed to let him shave off my coppery locks. It changed my life.

The experience of being pampered by my lover as he concentrated on uncovering my folds was very sensual and erotic. Knowing that he was inspecting every inch of my lady bits as he tenderly applied the razor was very freeing. He was totally focused on my most intimate possessions. It brought out a streak of exhibitionism in me that I didn't even know I had.

After the de-nuding of my mound came the feel of his tongue slowly crawling along my bare skin. It was luxurious. Every sensation was heightened without my dense pubic patch in the way.

Even more surprising was the intensity of sensations as we fucked. I was extremely aware of his own pubic thatch buffing my bare pussy as we pumped our way to release. It was as if my body had been liberated from some furry chastity belt. Every touch, kiss and stroke allowed a heightened awareness of feeling in my genital center.

Although that's the main reason I still shave, there are other incentives for daring to bare. For one thing, it looks good. I've got one of those small pussies, and shaved, it looks positively inviting -- or so my male lovers say. That's another thing, every man I've been to bed with in the last two years has loved the look. They still think it's sexy and wild even though it's so popular on porn sites. And my skin feels so soft, rubbing against my silk panties. Just a touch of whisper-smooth excitement all day long below my belt.

The actual process of your lover shaving you can be most erotic. Chances are that you'll both be a little inhibited at first. She'll be nervous about the possibility of being nicked and he may be a little afraid of razor burn around her most tender body parts. If you both just relax, you'll enjoy it immensely.

You'll need a fresh, new razor, shaving cream and a bowl of water. You might want to have a pair of scissors handy to take care of those pubic curls. I also enjoy having my shaver gently massage my mound with some oil or skin lotion for a finishing touch. Keep plenty of towels handy for an easy clean-up.

Another way that women can express themselves on a nice, clean-shaven snatch is with a tattoo. What a canvas! I've seen tattoos that range from a small, delicate rose to an intricately colored dragon. If that doesn't appeal to you, try some realistic looking fake tattoos that you can pick up almost anywhere.

It's sometimes a pain, what with nubs and all, but it's worth it. Take, for example, an encounter I had last week. This friend of mine, Wayne, really got turned on by shaving my treasure, but this time he had a specific request. He wanted to let it grow out to a luxurious bush so that we could share that experience…with another friend!

When Wayne judged my pubes to be long and bushy enough to be shorn, he told me to expect him and a buddy that evening. I was curious. He knew that I was not adverse to a threesome now and again, but I didn't want some stranger/weirdo messing around with my most sensitive areas.

Wayne introduced me to his friend, Alan. I watched as they draped my kitchen table with a cloth, brought out my shaving gear and positioned a standing lamp. Still not understanding, but intrigued by the elaborate preparations, I shed my robe and climbed onto the table. They undressed quickly.

As Wayne began clipping my curls, Alan unpacked jars of paint from a bag he'd brought. Wayne explained that Alan was an artist and had always wanted to paint a naked woman -- paint her actual body, that is. This way, all three of us were fulfilling a fantasy.

Wayne scooted me down to the edge of the table. He sat on a kitchen chair and concentrated on slowly clipping my unruly locks. Meanwhile, Alan had begun applying paint to my breasts, but not before giving each rosy nipple a gentle kiss. Such a gentleman!

Wayne finished his clipping duty and spread my lips wide for a taste of my honey. Alan the artist cautioned me against moving, but it wasn't easy to keep still with Wayne teasing my clit with his talented tongue.

Wayne spread shaving cream on my mound and began to carefully shave me of my fur. Alan finished with my titties and began moving his paint brush down my stomach. By the time Wayne needed me to shift positions to get at the soft downy pubes close to my tunnel, Alan had already completed my belly. Feeling kinda horny myself, I offered to suck Al's hard cock as he watched Wayne delicately finish sliding the razor across my skin.

As I sucked and licked Alan's tasty tool, he stared intently at my nearly nude snatch. Suddenly, he warned Wayne to stop for a moment and held my head, pushed his prick deep into my willing mouth as his syrup hit the back of my throat. I can tell it's been awhile since Alan had a good come!

My head was spinning as the guys switched places and Alan prepared to paint my puss. Looking like he needed some attention, I eagerly grabbed Wayne's thick stiffie and began licking it all over. I had just moved my face to better reach his balls when I felt Alan's hot tongue lightly play over my freshly shaved sex. I sucked one of Wayne's balls into my oral cavity and massaged it with my tongue as Alan explored and tasted my slick, juicy slit. Oh boy…here it comes…I felt that special orgasm rising from deep within…the kind I get when I've just been shaved and all my nerve endings are tingling. Alan kept his lapping tongue firmly on my clit as I bucked, quaked and moaned my pleasure.

Next, Alan wiped down my dripping cunt and began the task of painting my genital mound. Again, the proceedings in my kitchen were held up…this time as Wayne unceremoniously climaxed in my mouth. (I was such a good sport for his spurts!)

When Alan was through, they fist-bumped, congratulated each other and took pictures of his artistic creation while the paint was drying. As soon as I could, I ran to the bedroom mirror. Now this is art -- I looked so amazing!

He'd made my body into a lush garden full of incredibly realistic fruit. I had ripe apples on my breasts with juicy grapes between them. A vine of fruit snaked down my belly to a virtual cornucopia of garden delights. There were tomatoes, beans, squash, corn and carrots. Right over my mound he had created a large blossom, with its petals unfolding to expose my tender sex. He had made me into a hot hippie mama: Mother Earth. I was enchanted. Now here was pussy art I wanted to do more of!

They both stood in the doorway, completely naked and grinning proudly. "Fuck those guys," I thought. Seriously, I wanted to fuck them both. I've got this. Fuck them for the tribute they had paid me, fuck them for their respective creativity and fuck them for my own hungry needs. (It's been a few weeks, ok?)

Wayne rubbed some lube on his second hard-on of the evening while Alan fitted his big dick into my tight tunnel. Alan and I rolled over so that I was on top and Wayne entered my ass. In the mirror, we could see the way my painted body undulated with each thrust of our bodies. Fascinated, we watched my garden ripple as if a breeze was lightly touching its bounty.

Next month, I'm hoping to have a repeat performance. I wonder what Alan will paint then? No pressure, dude…

-- Sharin' Sharon In Seattle