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You can Ask Dr. Kat by emailing her at ask@drkat.com. Dear Dr. Kat, I have never experienced an orgasm during penetration without me doing clitoral stimulation myself. I have a very high level of sex drive, and reaching an orgasm during sex or masturbation has never been a problem for me. But the problem is that I feel that I am addicted to clitoral stimulation. Is there any way I can get an orgasm during sex without me touching myself? How can I improve my chances of getting an orgasm only by virtue of vaginal stimulation with my boyfriend? Thank you very much, Dear Tina, The fact that you are orgasmic with clitoral stimulation is great! Most women are not orgasmic during penetrative intercourse without clitoral stimulation. In our culture there is this mistaken value that a vaginal orgasm is somehow better. This simply isn't true. While some women happen to have vaginal orgasms (as a result of cervical or G-Spot stimulation - or they think they are having vaginal orgasms when actually their partner may simply be coming in more contact with their clitoris than they realize), there is no difference in value. While experimenting is great (perhaps try positions that involve more cervical stimulation or G-Spot attention), one type of orgasm is not considered better than another. I would suggest that while experimenting, don't forget to give your clitoris the attention it deserves. If this is your tried and true method to orgasm, I would not abandon it. Maybe try a sex toy like Adam and Eve's Couples Enhancer Ring which your male partner can wear over his penis (very pleasurable for him too) while providing you with more clitoral stimulation. You also use the term that you think you're "addicted" to clitoral stimulation. I find this highly unlikely. Unless you are consumed with masturbating clitorally so much that it interferes with your ability to function in the world, I would just say that you have a high preference for clitoral stimulation. Sincerely,
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Spend some time playing free sex games - like "Sexy Picture Find" & Connect the Dots. Download some wallpapers & learn about our sexy contract girls. |
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Candidly Speaking When I started my company, Femme Productions, in order to create erotica from a woman's point of view back in 1984, the idea of watching an adult movie with your partner was almost unheard of since most X-rated fare didn't appeal to women. Fortunately couples erotica has taken off and there's a growing awareness of the many benefits of watching together: It can jumpstart desire after a busy day; it can give you new ideas and fantasies to play with; it can model how certain sex acts are done; and it can open up an otherwise difficult discussion about what you like and want to try. I'm often asked about the best way to introduce the idea. First, it's crucial that your partner believes that he/she is the one you want to be with. Women are particularly sensitive. | |
If she isn't confident of your desire for her, she'll fear you might prefer to be with the woman on screen. My friend, sex-therapist Dr. Marty Klein, points out that most men are not wishing their woman looked like the women on screen, but that she was as comfortable with sex and with her body as the women onscreen. So be generous with the compliments. A woman who isn't confident about your desire for her will not feel comfortable watching an adult movie with you. As for how to say it, sometimes it's easier to point the finger at someone else! You could say, "I read in (fill it in) magazine or on such and such a TV show that watching sexy movies together can be great fun". You may need to assure him or her that you're very happy with your sex life and it's not for a lack of satisfaction that you're suggesting it, but that it's another way to share a new experience together. It's also important that you watch something both of you will enjoy. It might help if you've done a little research first. Check out the offerings on a web site that caters to both men and women, or an erotic shop near you that makes the effort to attract women customers. Adam & Eve has a growing number of retail stores that cater to both women and men. Talk to the women who work there and ask for their advice. Look for story lines rather then gonzo wall-to-wall sex DVDs. Search for box covers that feature a couple in a sensual embrace. And guys, even if it looks a tad "soft" in its presentation, many a man has told me that just watching his woman getting hot makes it all worth it. So break out the refreshments and a bottle of lube, and treat yourself to an inexpensive date night right in the privacy of your own home! Candida Royalle is a former star of the blue movie screen who in 1984 created Femme Productions(R) and pioneered the genre of woman-friendly adult erotica. In 1999, she launched the Euro-designed Natural Contours(R) line of high-style discreet intimate products. She's the author of How to Tell a Naked Man What to Do, (Simon & Schuster) and a sought after lecturer at universities and professional conferences, including the World Congress on Sexology, the American Psychiatric Association and the Smithsonian Institute. Royalle's product lines are available through AdamEve.com. For more information about Candida Royalle, visit www.candidaroyalle.com. |
Make Your Christmas Wishes Come True There are a ton of sexy things you can do to celebrate Christmas, from Mr. & Mrs. Claus roleplaying to taking advantage of the mistletoe to get oral sex. While your friends at Adam & Eve heartily endorse both of those activities, we've decided to try something completely new this year. About a week or two before Christmas, sit down with your lover and two sheets of paper. Each of you gets to write one thing you want to do or try sexually. Trade sheets, and then it's up to you to make your lover's wish come true, or at least come as close to true as reasonably possible. It's a great way to show your love for each other, while at the same time keeping true to the spirit of the holidays. Merry Christmas! We'll see you again next year! |
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